sorry about the title but I had to get farley to read my shiiyt somehow.
First off, I guess I'll say that this is not going to be "poetic" (House 1) but rather, I just want to share my feelings with you guys about a few things. I am clearly known for making the classic pity jokes around our group of friends. I have thrown out so many divorce and fat jokes that I am completely desensitized to them. I am saying that in the hope that those jokes are not where you mind will go when you read the next few sentences. As all of you know Rita and I broke up after just over two years of dating. I don't like to show it or talk about it that much but i has been really hard on me. I suppose that it isn't hard in the traditional sense. I think that I made the right choice and it has helped me grow in ways that I don't really know how to explain. It hurts because for two years I put the majority of my efforts into that relationship. I showed her more of myself and gave her more of myself than almost anyone (insert a dyson dirty joke here), but seriously it is hard seeing something you pour so much of yourself into fail like that. It's hard knowing that 3 months ago I was holding her in my arms thinking she might be my wife someday. I cant explain why it has been hard but I just has been. I said all of that to set up my main point (clever transitional writing).
I was reading Romans today and came across something that I had read before but really caught my attention for some reason. Paul says, "By Gods will I hope to come to you with joy and together with you be refreshed." I hate when people pull out one sentence from any piece of literature and push there own agenda with it, but I can't type all of Romans 15 so bare with me. If you have the time read it to get the full context. It is so amazing to see that he views spending time with these people, his friends, fellow believers whatever as refreshing. I thought about you guys, my friends. Some of the only times of my life that I would call "refreshing" have been spent with you guys. I thought about Paul the people he planned to visit. I wondered if the prayed every second they were together and fasted and studied scripture. I kind of doubt it. I bet they ate together and laughed. I bet they spent time talking and simply enjoying each others company. Like us I bet they told stories. I don't want to list specific examples but some of the only things that have helped me get through this stuff with Rita has been the good company, the good conversations, and all that comes along with having such incredible friends.
I really do love all you guys and I love how special what we have is. I know that inevitably I will be an ass to one of you soon or I will be the opposite of refreshing or simply not be a good friend, but with that in mind I hope you all know that your friendships mean the world to me. Hopefully this hasn't been boring to read or think about. Just remember our jobs are to love each other well(semi-impossible) and in some way help each other towards God.